But reading a textbook or watching a documentary isn't exactly the same as walking the roads where people once laid piled one on top of another. It isn't the same as stepping foot inside a church that is completely covered in stacks of clothes. You see it was here 15 years ago that men, women, and children ran for safety as they had before in past scares but instead met the perpetrators who killed them by the 1,000s. These dirty, blood soaked, wrinkled clothes of all shapes and sizes are of clothes of innocent people. Their bones are not far away, stacked neatly in piles in mass graves outside the church and down below ground level. The scent isn't pleasant. The feelings disturbing. Their skulls are cracked open from the machetes, clubs, and bullets. The blood stains on one brick wall mark the awful remains of the pain felt by the babies that were thrown up against it inside while the mothers and fathers and siblings watched.
It was almost too much to handle. You see, what I felt today and saw with my own eyes I cannot share with you completely. Some things can only be understood through experience. The stories of the survivors here are incredible. Their scars speak louder than their words ever will.
Today Rwanda is a peaceful place. Progress has taken place, more than any Rwandan ever could imagine. One ethnic group is living next to the other peacefully just a short 15 years later. Discrimination has stopped. Praise God for working in this nation already. Praise God for the reconciliation and forgiveness that is already taking place.
But the Rwandan people still have such a long way to go. They keep their distance. Trust no one. Doubt everything. This is what you are taught. Everyone's story is different. Maybe yesterday at the grocery store you ran into the man who killed your entire family. Maybe you found an extended relative alive finally after having raised yourself as an orphan over the last 15 years. Maybe you are accepting the guilt of your killing and are trying to forgive yourself so that you can look your neighbor in the eye again. Maybe you helped hide and feed refugees while risking your own very life. You see, everyone 15 years old or older in Rwanda today has a story. Although they might be horror stories, they all end with their survival and the hope of restoring this nation together. The needs here are many. The orphans are great. The family structure is unstable. The trust is small. The faith is weak. But the harvest is plentiful and the workers are many!! Praise God for this opportunity. The memories are terror and the hearts are scarred. But the soul is yearning and thirsty for something more, for hope everlasting.
Shocked. Upset. Angry. Frustrated. Confused. I have never had such an emotionally draining day as I have today. I pray that I will never forget what I have heard or seen. I pray that God will bless this nation and will help them restore themselves to be a peaceful nation that glorifies God. Pray for this nation. Pray for the emotionally scarred, spiritually crushed, psychologically hurt Rwandans. The past is to be remembered but no dwelled upon. For tomorrow holds a new day that can be as different from yesterday and today as you want it to be. I am excited to see how God will work with these broken people in the days and years to come. For when you are weak, your Father is strong.
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